


Five Things, part V - B/J, Surprises, and "Stranger Things"

by AHS



Series: Five Things Brian and Justin Found Out [5]
Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: M/M, alternating pov
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-06-07
Updated: 2007-06-07
Packaged: 2017-10-12 21:37:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/129350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AHS/pseuds/AHS
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>5th and FINAL of five ficlets that each deal with Brian and/or Justin finding out about something we didn't get to see them find out on the show.  In this one, the boys find out about the whole double bouquet-catching thing.  Alternates POV.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Five Things, part V - B/J, Surprises, and "Stranger Things"

(S4)

 _Brian's POV_

I can’t believe our little munchers have been married for two years already. Or worse, that they’ve been together for close to a decade (which means the delightful Melanie has been in my life that long as well). Makes me feel old, but don’t tell anybody.

Maybe it’s not just that. Maybe it’s that I’m with the same guy now that I was two years ago when they tied the stupid knot. Considering that it’s Justin, I’m happy about it, but who the fuck would have guessed. I can still hear him on those stairs, right before he told me he was ditching me and the White Party to stay for the wedding. See him there, all 18-year-old enthusiasm and romantic notions. Hinting that one day that could be us, and something like, “Stranger things have happened.” I don’t think so, although the fact that I didn’t run like hell when he said that comes close.

But the girls still seem to be enjoying married life, in their girly way. I guess even Mel, getting fat with Mikey’s kid, now qualifies as a chick. To celebrate, they threw a pleasant enough little shindig, considering how many of the guests were the dyke equivalent of _Gay As Blazes_. When we got bored, Justin and I locked ourselves in their guest bathroom and I took my sweet time sucking him off. Giving total shit-eating grins to the line of angry, legs-crossed lezzies waiting when we finally returned to the party. They’d all heard him come, loudly, and their looks of disgust only intensified when I made a big show of licking my lips clean. Okay… that was fun.

Now the party was over. Deb had left. Emmett. Ted and Dr. Twinkie. Hunter, The Professor. Even Michael had eventually stopped cooing to his unborn offspring and gone home. Only Justin and I were still hanging around. Darling boy that he is, he was in the kitchen, cleaning up so Lindsay and Mel wouldn’t have to. I was in the living room, playing with my son, under the watchful eyes of his sickeningly cuddly mommies.

“I’m not sure how you even rated an invite to this party, Brian, considering that you couldn’t be bothered to attend our wedding,” Mel snarked.

“I did you a favor. Couldn’t have me looking better in my tux than the… _bride_?”… I still wasn’t sure what Mel was… “in hers.”

“Honey, I told you. Brian was willing to give his tickets to us, but I made him go,” said Lindsay, defending me again.

“There, you see? Worked out best for everyone. I got to try being noble, and I still got to go to the White Party. You two got married. Everybody happy. Right, Sonny Boy?” I ran a little toy car up Gus’s arm and over the top of his head, and he answered in giggles.

“Besides… it was like I was there.” Not sure why I said that, but I did.

“How, exactly?” Linds had to ask, doubting eyebrow cutely quirked.

I smiled. Eh, maybe it was a grimace. “Because the universe had a sense of humor that weekend. Didn’t I tell you? The section of the party with the hottest men also had a wedding theme. And guess who caught the bouquet?”

I thought Mel was about to choke on her amusement (no such luck), sputtering, “You made a catch? I thought you had a pitch-only policy.” Lindsay managed to mostly contain her laughter, a hand politely over her mouth. Gus, though he didn’t know why, was laughing at me too, mimicking the mommies. Little traitor.

I feigned offense. “Just what is so funny?”

“Oh, nothing. It’s really not,” said Lindsay, not meaning a word. “We’re just wondering why you never mentioned this before.”

“Maybe not to you. But it went right at the top of my résumé.”

“You know what it means, don’t you, Brian?” she grinned. “You’re next to get married.”

Oh, that’s _very_ funny. “Right. That bullshit tradition only applies at a real wedding. At the White Party, it means you’re next to get a lap dance from Shane, the cock ring bearer. Much better deal, thank you.”

Not surprisingly, the munchers didn’t seem that interested in Shane or his cock, but now they were also whispering excitedly to each other about something, their eyes suspiciously wide.

“Hey, hey… Something you want to share with the rest of the class?”

“Nothing. Nothing at all,” claimed a smirking, full of shit Mel, while Lindsay hopped up, disappeared for a second, and came back with some big white book with iridescent rainbow trim. Heart in the middle, with today’s date, two years earlier, written inside it. She dropped it in my lap and picked up Gus, then answered my _What-the-fuck?_ look before I could ask.

“I just realized that somehow I forgot to ever make you suffer through looking at our wedding album. Better late than never.”

“Says you.” I may have been making a sulky face, but I opened the album and started looking at the photos. Lindsay and Melanie, in white dress and tux, picture after picture. Dancing, kissing… being horribly predictable and shoving cake in each other’s faces. Linds looked good, and yeah, they looked happy. Glowing, even. There was one shot of them holding Gus and making silly faces. Damn, he‘d grown a lot.

Finally there were pictures of some of the guests. Vic and Deb, in less hostile times, standing proudly next to the cake. Michael, all aw-shucks with The Professor’s huge arm around him, in the early days of their courtship. Ted and Emmett, before they hooked up and that all went to hell. Emmett and Leda, now there was an interesting pair. Mikey, Deb, and Vic. Mel and Ted. Deb and Justin. Linds and Justin… Fuck it, I might have to steal that one. They were just so blond and smiley and friggin’ adorable.

More pictures of everybody dancing. A lot of pairs of seriously unattractive lesbians. Then Justin… hah… apparently doing The Hustle with Vic and Deb. Emmett slow-dancing with the now dead George… He’d been a cool old guy. Justin again, dancing by himself, with the boys, the girls… _Fuck_. There was a photo of Justin dancing with Gus half asleep on his shoulder. Sonny Boy squared. It was officially one of the best things I had ever seen.

I realized that must have been what Lindsay wanted me to see, until I flipped one more damn page. Action shots of the bouquet toss, ending with… Of course he did. Justin caught the fucking bouquet.

I gave no indication on my face of what I’d seen, especially after glancing up to find the girls still grinning like the pussies that swallowed the canary. I don’t know if they thought I’d scream and run the fuck away, or if they thought they were making some kind of point, but I smiled calmly and handed over the album. “Nice,” I said.

I knew Lindsay wasn’t buying it. “See anything… interesting?”

Before I could come up with a good, classy, smartass response, we heard, “What did I miss?” Justin was standing there, looking expectantly at us.

“Ahh, just the amazing symmetry of life.”

“Huh?” He frowned at Mel‘s weird comment until I shook my head, indicating it wasn‘t important. “Uh, okay. Everything’s put away. Kitchen’s pretty much clean.”

“Thank you, sweetie.” Mel and Linds went over to him and rained kisses of gratitude all over him.

I got up and took my place next to him, shooing them away. “Enough, enough.” I slipped an arm around his waist and grabbed a hold of his fingers. “Shouldn’t you have dishpan hands?”

“Still soft,” he said. “I’m magic like that.”

And he knew it. “Ready to go?”

“Yeah. Bye Linds, bye Mel. Bye Gus.” He gave them all a kiss on the cheek.

I kissed Gus on the head, even if he was in Mel’s arms. I would have said a goodbye to Lindsay, but she was busy whispering something in Justin’s ear. She looked all too pleased with herself, and I just _knew_ what she was saying. Justin looked up at me for a second, mouth open, but quickly stifled his expression and just said, “Let’s go.”

I knew I should be worried about him bringing up the bouquet-catching when we got home, but I had more on my mind. Like waiting for a doctor to tell me if I had cancer, and how the hell I was going to keep Justin away from my balls.

**********

 _

Justin’s POV… back a few minutes…

_

Man, lesbians eat a lot.

I cracked up at my own thought. Well, not so much that as the joke Brian would have made if he’d heard me say it.

But he was in the living room and I was in Mel and Lindsay’s kitchen, trying to get things cleaned up and leftover food put away. I knew the girls were tired, and especially with Mel pregnant, I didn’t want them to have to do it. And, putting pasta salad into Tupperware containers gave me time to think about the party, as well as the wedding it had celebrated.

The party had been fun, mostly. And Brian pulling me into the bathroom and going down on me for, like, twenty minutes had done a hell of a lot to fill in any dull spots. Surprised me, too. I mean, Brian could be a really generous lover, more so than most people would probably think, but he’d usually take any opportunity for me to suck him off. I didn’t mind; I loved it and took it as a compliment. But today, as soon as I pulled him up and tried to get in his pants, he was saying we’d deprived the party of our company long enough. Sometimes I think he just likes to keep me confused. I guess it’s only fair, since I know I do the same to him.

I remember the look on his face two years ago when I made that oh so innocent “stranger things have happened” comment. I was sort of surprised that he still seemed disappointed when I said I wasn’t going with him after that. Almost as surprised as I’d been when he invited me in the first place. Brian Kinney taking a… date? boyfriend?… to the tropical fantasy fuckfest of the year? I cursed my sentimental, romantic nature for making the girls’ wedding so important to me, but I was glad I went, even stag.

After Brian got back and I told him all the details, I got the feeling part of him wished he’d been there, too. Of course, I left out one little detail. The comment on the stairs probably made him nervous enough. If he knew about me catching the bouquet, he’d be convinced I’d done it on purpose because I had visions of place settings dancing in my head. And I have no need to hear his _Marriage bad… Imitation heterosexual union… Blah blah blah…_ speech again. That was something that hadn’t changed in two years and never would.

I finished up in the kitchen and headed into the living room to find Brian looking mildly irritated and the girls trying not to laugh. When I asked what I’d missed, Mel said something I didn’t understand. Brian seemed in a hurry to go, which wasn’t strange, because I was too. But, right before we left, Lindsay stopped me and whispered a newly acquired secret in my ear.

“Two years ago. White Party. Wedding theme. Brian caught the bouquet, just about the same time you caught ours. Yes, you heard me right.”

Oh my God. I blinked, trying to absorb this new information. Picturing Brian, in one of those hot all white outfits he’d tried on for me, actually catching a bouquet. I snuck a look at him and got the feeling he knew exactly what she’d told me. He wasn’t happy about it, either. I resisted a dangerous urge to laugh, keeping my smile low-key and saying, “Let’s go” instead. Following Brian out the door, I turned and mouthed a “Thank you!” at Lindsay, letting her see the monster grin I‘d been keeping at bay. Oh shit… this could be fun.

The ride home was mostly silent, except that I swear he could hear the sound of my lips pulling aside to make way for my teeth, because he kept throwing me dirty looks. When we got to the loft, I was ready for him to be in a pissy mood, so he surprised me when he pretty much tackled me onto the couch, horny but not at all mad. He declared a “no hands” rule, which I made a pouty face about, but didn’t really mind when he pinned my wrists for good measure. It started as a fast fuck, and he surprised me again when he slowed it down, drawing the pleasure out. We both came hard, and he smacked my ass when I got up afterwards to go to the kitchen. Something else people wouldn’t think about Brian is that sometimes, in lieu of the customary post-fuck smoke, he is just as happy to have a nice, juicy apple.

As I plucked two shiny ones from the fruit bowl and brought them back for us, I wondered absently if Brian knew about me catching Mel and Linds’ bouquet. I decided the girls had too much fun letting me in on Brian’s half of the story, and they would have found a way to let him in on my half. In that spirit of fun, I had an idea.

“Catch!” I yelled, as I tossed an apple at Brian. He caught it, thanks to great reflexes, and narrowed his eyes at my obviousness. _There’s_ Pissy Brian! And he stuck around when I applauded, then held my apple over my head and waved it around, as in triumph.

“Let me guess,” he spat. “We’re the next _fruits_ to get married?”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“Good, because it doesn’t mean anything.”

“I know.”

“That’s never happening.”

“Of course not.”

But you know what I’ve found out? It’s the things Brian doesn’t mean to say, or mean to show, or mean for me to know about, that tend to mean the most.

“You have to admit, it’s a pretty cool coincidence.”

“Hmph.”

“Notice how I didn’t say anything about fate?”

“Hmph.”

In bed, I tried again to blow him. He rolled away, acting like he was mad at me, but he so wasn’t. I rolled my eyes and hummed The Wedding March softly in revenge, resolving to figure him out tomorrow.

**********

 _

Brian’s POV

_

 _Okay God, here’s the deal… Can’t believe I’m fucking praying… if that’s what you call this… So, look, if I come out of this alive, I’ll… do something good? Be a better person or some shit like that? Isn’t that what I’m supposed to promise? I sure as hell don’t know. I’m not going to church, with or without my mother, so you can forget that. Not until my funeral, so if you want me there that bad, you’re going to have to kill me. But, uh… I’d prefer if you didn’t. Now, if you get me out of this with both balls beautifully intact…_

I turned my head and watched Justin sleep.

 _

Fuck. Maybe stranger things have happened.

_

 _*****_

 _

Sorry, Sunshine. Missed it by one.

_   



End file.
